pretend to know, Saturday is the one day of the week when Mommy gets to sleep in. I don’t have to set the alarm for 6:30 or drag your sweet little bottoms out of bed to go to school. I buy your favorite doughnuts, so you have a treat to eat while you’re watching Saturday morning TV. I make sure that the contents of the dishwasher are clean so that you won’t have to look for a clean cup to pour milk into.
All of this, so that on Saturday, Mommy can get a couple of extra hours of sleep. All of this, so that your mommy is a little less crazy and cranky the rest of the week. One day, one morning. It’s not so much to ask.
Ergo, today must not be Saturday, after all. If it were, I would only just now (2 1/2 hours after you decided to get up at 6:00), be making coffee and starting to read new posts from all of my blogging friends. If it were Saturday, I would not have had to broker a complex negotiation between two opposing factions of the H family at 6:50 this morning. If it were Saturday, I would not have had to re-explain the terms of the treaty just 30 minutes later. And if it were Saturday, I wouldn’t have had to say these things 17 thousand times:
“Boy, stop chasing your sister around the house with your remote controlled car! And Girl, stop screaming! It’s 7:20 in the morning! And stop fighting over that piece of Styrofoam! Styrofoam
for godsake!No, I’m not going to decide right now who gets to have it!” Rinse, repeat. And repeat again. Sorry for yelling. I’m sorry, I am.
Chaos + yelling = No more sleep
So, yes, things got better when I finally gave up on sleep and asked you both to come snuggle with me. I felt guilty for the yelling and I apologized. You apologized too, Boy, but Girl, I’m still waiting. Never mind, though. I know you’re sorry on a deep and devoted level that transcends words. Right? Right.
The snuggling helped us all feel better. And we felt even better when the moment turned into a jumping on Mommy fest! There’s nothing better than that to send Mommy
to the chiropractor into fits of giggles. It was good, hilarious fun, and put a whole different face on the day. Yep, we turned that frown upside down, didn’t we?
So, as the rest of the day stretches out ahead of us, let’s just agree on a few things.
1) Mommy will need a nap later. Be prepared.
2) Mommy may drink some wine later. Pretend not to notice.
3) Now that the Styrofoam Treaty has been brokered, I expect no more arguments over packaging materials. Ever.
4) You will get something better than doughnuts for lunch. I promise.
5) Next Saturday? If you wake up and find that all the noisy toys are hidden away, there’s not a bit of Styrofoam to be found, and there’s nothing left to do but watch TV quietly? Just have a doughnut, and roll with it.
With all my love,
P.S. Yes, I know Daddy called at 8:00 and I wouldn’t have gotten to sleep in much longer anyway. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go email a list to Daddy.