Have you ever taken your car to the mechanic to try to diagnose that funny little noise coming from under the hood, only when he got in the car with you to drive around and listen for it, the car wouldn’t produce the funny little sound?
Today was like that here at the H household. It was calm and peaceful. No trace of yesterday’s drama (or the day before, or the week before that) or tears. Girl had only sweet words for everyone except for one (only one!) little verbal dust-up with Boy about something not very important to either of them.
The car ran like a dream today. Figures.
Thank you all for the thoughtful, seasoned advice you shared on my last post. I sent out the distress signal, and you all answered with wisdom and solidarity. I appreciate it so, so much. Your response was what I hoped for and needed. I feel like I have a few new tools to try, and that I’m not alone in this.
I love this community.
One of my favorite suggestions (among many wonderful ones) was from Anna at The End of Motherhood. She linked to a post she wrote back in January called It’s About (Special) Time. This seems like a great place to start. Focused attention for 15 minutes a day, with each of my children alone on an activity they each choose. Focused, uninterruped, unshared, fun time. Right now, I sit down with each of them (we snuggle in a comfy chair) after school almost every day (we aim for every day) and ask about their day at school (what was the best part, worst part, funniest part). But this is something more than that. It would be time with me that Girl (and Boy) could count on and look forward to it. It’s worth a shot. It certainly can’t hurt.
Thank you for the book suggestions, also. I will take a look at them at the bookstore soon. Maybe as soon as tomorrow. Not that I’m desperate.
It was great to have such a peaceful day with Girl, but I’d be crazy to think that I can expect the same tomorrow or the next day. But I feel better prepared now, and that’s good for both of us, for all of us.
Still, it couldn’t hurt to keep a bottle of vodka in the freezer.