Lord, it is (finally) time

by Jennifer on August 3, 2008

Before anything else, I have to tell you that for the first time ever I finally beat my sister, Ducky, at Scrabble. You have no idea how excited I am!

(Or I was, until I realized that it took me almost four decades to beat my sister at Scrabble. Hey, she’s smart.)

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In case any of you were calling around, after my last post, to find a spot for me at Shady Brook or some another ubiquitously-named mental health institution, I’ll try to put your minds at ease.

Akelamalu pointed out “What choice do you have?”

She’s right–the alternative to keeping on, bucking up, or keeping one’s chin up isn’t so great. But there are a lot of choices about how we go through a day or a week or a year, and I what I hoped to find out from all of you (and did) were the things that make the rough spots more bearable for you. What invisible thread pulls you forward, or what activity works like balm to soothe your nerves.

Who knows, maybe the routine saves us, too, even as we bemoan the day in and day out of it all. If we didn’t have to see to the basic things–the meals, the bills, the floor that needs mopping, the refrigerator door that needs fixing, the ants that need removing–maybe the vacuum left behind would be what would lay waste to an essential part of us that needs to feel like we’ve got things handled, that we even can handle a reasonable amount of hell and come out stronger on the other side of it.

So, I have choices. I can get together with friends (always makes me feel better), or not. I can clean my house, or not (hate the cleaning, love the result). Take time to play with my children, or not. Read a good book, listen to good music, go for a drive, or not. Do something to be financially productive, or not. Cook something good to eat, or…wait, there’s cooking? Never mind. But I’m good with the rest of it, for now, especially the part that includes hanging out with friends.

Because not sounds like a big downer.

My cousin Louise reminded me that exercise might change the face of things, too, and she’s right. Mrs. G inspired me earlier in the week to get back to it, so I am. School starts in a week, and I won’t have any excuses left. And feeling stronger and/or having a smaller ass won’t exactly make my life worse, will it?

(Ooh, good point, she thinks.)

So even though the ratio of sunshine to what-fresh-hell hasn’t changed much in the last couple of days, I’m going to move on. Hopeful, and maybe even with a less cluttered desk (it could happen).

Radical times, my friends.

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Now, I have some karmic housecleaning to do.

Some lovely people have given me some lovely awards recently, and I’ve been slow to acknowledge them here and to pass them on (hence, the title, which I borrowed from Rilke and for which I will give him full credit in just a minute).

First, a huge thank you to the four people who kindly shared this first award with me, the Arte Y Pico award (four! I’m a lucky girl). From Cath at Crazy Cath, Sandy at Momisodes, Natalie at Tell Me About It, and Tootsie Farklepants at Vintage Thirty:

I think the instructions were to share it with 5 others, so here we go (opens envelope):

San Diego Momma

The Leaping Thought

Velvet Lava

Out & About in New York City

Woman On the Verge

Another big thank you to Lisa at Verybusymomwith4 and to Lennie at Alphabet Studio for the following award. I makes me feel brillante! It’s what I think of them, also.

I’m passing it on to Stacey at Any Mommy Out There, because her writing is brillante.

And last, and not even close to least, a heartfelt thank you to Louise at Potted Frog for this next award. She always makes my day, too!

I’m passing it along to all of you, because you write things that make my day more interesting and more fun, and because you showed up here. And that always makes my day.

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It’s not fall yet, but with school starting in a week, it feels like the end of summer. I love this, especially the last few lines.

Fall Day

Lord, it is time. This was a very big summer.
Lay your shadows over the sundial,
and let the winds loose on the fields.

Command the last fruits to be full;
give them two more sunny days,
urge them on to fulfillment and throw
the last sweetness into the heavy wine.

Who has no house now, will never build one.
Whoever is alone now, will long remain so,
Will watch, read, write long letters
and will wander in the streets, here and there
restlessly, when the leaves blow.

–Rainer Maria Rilke

{ 21 comments… read them below or add one }

texasholly @ June Cleaver Nirvana August 3, 2008 at 7:00 pm

I am glad things are looking up. Yeah. And the scrabble victory…awesome! No wonder things are looking up.

Congrats on all the awards…you totally deserve them all and MORE!

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Louise August 3, 2008 at 8:25 pm

Congratulations on the awards. FOUR Arte Y Pico. Holy Cow!

Love the photo with this post.

Actually love the poem which is rare for me. (I just never “get” poetry very well, so I don’t usually love it. This one is one of the few I “get.”)

And doing is much better than not! Keep plugging away. It will be better. And if it’s not better today, it will be tomorrow.

Louises last blog post..Evening

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Jenn @ Juggling Life August 3, 2008 at 9:48 pm

It sounds like you found the perspective you were looking for. We don’t start school until after Labor Day, so it’s still full on summer for me!

Jenn @ Juggling Lifes last blog post..It’s Not A Comic, But It Is Funny

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San Diego Momma August 3, 2008 at 10:06 pm

Oh no.
Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no.
I mean: YES! Thanks! You know I’m in awe of everything you write, so to be given this means the world. Thanks so much.

And oh no, because seriously? I don’t know if I can subject myself to more great blogs like the ones whose company I’m in above. I’m already in enough trouble with my husband for choosing the computer over him most nights.

Still, the written word beckons. He can wait (I hope).

San Diego Mommas last blog post..Twits? Tweeters? Twats?

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San Diego Momma August 3, 2008 at 10:07 pm

And I love Rilke. Great choice.

San Diego Mommas last blog post..Twits? Tweeters? Twats?

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JCK August 3, 2008 at 10:54 pm

Congrats on the Scrabble victory! And all those nice awards.

Glad you are coming up for air. I applaud you reaching out.

Can’t believe school starts in a week! Yikes!

Sending hugs. Just in case you still needed one. 😉

JCKs last blog post..So, the next time Sitemeter & Internet Explorer have a rendezvous…

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Madge August 4, 2008 at 3:37 am

I loves me some Rilke.

You play Ducky at Scrabble? You are brave. And smarter than me. and I just thought of the clocktower (oh look, I inserted a private joke in my comment — shame on me).

Madges last blog post..Remains of the (Summer) Days

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Ducky August 4, 2008 at 5:54 am

Heh. Was that meant to take me down a notch?

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melissa August 4, 2008 at 6:50 am

A pretty poem AND some new blogs to read. Thanks!

melissas last blog post..An update, a favor, a beginning

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anymommy August 4, 2008 at 8:50 am

I really am honored – thank you – it’s high praise from someone whose writing I love so much! Also, I’m with San Diego Momma, I simply cannot find even one more fabulous blog. The day is too short.

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Kate August 4, 2008 at 8:56 am

My nephew started highschool today.
August 4th!

What happened to summer ending on August 31st?

Just sayin…

Kates last blog post..Cake!

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Ann August 4, 2008 at 9:08 am

Aw, shucks. THANK YOU. And, congrats on FOUR Art y Picos plus the others – so well deserved!

I’m thinking a stay at Shady Brook sounds kinda nice right about now. It was one of those days yesterday.

Thanks for the poem, lovely.

Anns last blog post..It’s All About The Cherries

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Akelamalu August 4, 2008 at 11:29 am

Congratulations on the Scrabble win and the awards. So happy to hear your outlook is brighter. 🙂

Akelamalus last blog post..Oblivious….

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Daryl August 4, 2008 at 12:09 pm

I am SO honored to be included in a list of bloggers who actually blog good/interesting posts…

Daryls last blog post..

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liv August 4, 2008 at 3:05 pm

you leave me dizzy…

but, i have been quite tired lately.

wait! this was about you?

ducks head in shame and walks away…

livs last blog post..oh, my…

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Lisa Milton August 4, 2008 at 4:20 pm

I’m becoming a big believer in the exercise gig. It really helped yesterday when I was feeling dopey and down.

(At least afterwards.)

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Trollpop Bagelstien August 4, 2008 at 5:11 pm

Coluores and things. wings? Nay I say to those who doubt my fury of the night. I simply wish to elect a posit. The earthly mirrored arms of my waning soul bemake to fit a foolish curse upon the heads of many. Starbucks and graceful puddings are enough of my worries…

Trollpop Bagelstiens last blog post..Adulterous Confectionary!

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Lisa August 4, 2008 at 5:26 pm

Congrats on all the awards–you deserve ’em!
And on cleaning the house–why bother, it’ll just get messy again 😉

Lisas last blog post..So I do this just about every weekday at five

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Kimberly August 4, 2008 at 7:06 pm

Congrats on the awards – you deserve each one. And also on the Scrabble win.

I have to say, I’m a bit relieved to read this post. I sometimes feel like my life is just a series of things to deal with: fetch a glass of milk, clean up a mess, make lunch, try to get some work done, give kids a bath, clean litter box, etc., etc., etc. And it’s sort of a relief to see I’m not the only one who feels that way at times. I swear, I was thinking my life was missing some big thing, but maybe that’s just . . . life. Not that it can’t be fun or fantastic, but you have to get through a certain amount of drudgery every day and that’s just it. I know – sounds depressing. But maybe it’s the drudgery that helps make other relatively ordinary things (a hug, a smile, a hummingbird) seem so fantastic?

Gah, it’s late and I’m rambling, but I hope you get what I’m trying to say.

Kimberlys last blog post..Things remembered

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Tootsie Farklepants August 4, 2008 at 7:24 pm

Congrats on your awards! And the scrabble!

Tootsie Farklepantss last blog post..There’s Only so Much I could say About Sea World

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me August 4, 2008 at 7:41 pm

Caught wind of your big victory on Facebook and had to wander over to congratulate. Now I know who to drink to tonight!

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