Comments on: Stones

By: Sandi McBride

Sandi McBride — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 14:30:54 +0000

Oddly all my favorite “famly shows”, Make Room for Daddy, Father Knows Best, Leave it to Beaver, got the family dynamic right for tv, but each show had at least one child actor whose life at home bore little resemblance to the one they portrayed. The only one that seemed to escape that blight of home cruelty was The Andy Griffith Show…I think you feel in your heart that since your mother was made to go, she is still wrong in that she made to attempt to take you and siblings with her. And so you suffer still. Just remember that every family has it’s problems…no one’s is perfect.
Congrats on Post of the day mention
Sandi

By: Merisi

Merisi — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 12:35:59 +0000

I came over from David’s Authorblog, to congratulate you on winning the Post of the Day Award. I have read your story today. Not knowing more about your parent’s behavior and your childhood, I would say that your dream sounds hopeful, a sign of somebody coming out of a nightmare. The writing is exquisite, painful to read even for somebody not involved, and so very touching. I wish you the best in the world for your future. There comes a point in life when one realises that one has surmounted the need to look back, to batte with the past, but arrives at a point where a genuine need arises, to forgive no matter what happened, and to go on and live life to the fullest. I wish you all the best on your way forward!

By: moannie

moannie — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 11:40:57 +0000

So many sins are commited by parents upon their children, unwittingly in their belief that kids don’t notice or care when they fight, brawl separate and divorce. And wittingly as witnessed by the dreadful stories of neglect and brutality we read every day. How we cope, as adults differs of course, depending on our characters. Some, like myself, bury the hurt deep inside us, so deep that it is almost forgotten until something triggers a memory. Others bear he pain like a prominant visible scar that has only a thin skin of tissue that is easily broken.

I have written about my past and my family-just for my children, and post excerps from it occasionally, finding the responses helpful and healing. And for you the search for healing continues. If you could find it in your heart to believe that your mother’s leaving was an act, not about you, but about her circumstances, her inabilty to cope, and know that she suffered. Forgive her, and your father and move on and you will be stronger for it.

By: Fat frumpy and fifty

Fat frumpy and fifty — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 09:16:12 +0000

Oh gosh!!! Like Louise, I really not sure what to say or if I can say anything without upsetting anyone…but when I start to type it will brim over in a flood!

ALL I KNOW is this, (for me anyhow) now that I am an adult, fully? grown and a mother, wife and all which that enfolds…. is that to maintain sanity. It is best to stop wondering about which one cannot DO anything..theause it is all about perspective and attitudes.

past is the past and however much we go over it we cannot change what has passed and we will never know what happened, what informed other choices, becauseTheir recollections will never match up, let alone with yours..
It isn’t my place to judge l don;t feel as most people do the best (or worst) they can do at the time…and it is a given, it is done. Of course we can all move forward and make the future better because that is all one can do.

Of course here l’m not talking about such things where behaviours are criminal or unlawful….but I try to not judge and think, walk a mile a their shoes, in their life’s context, their personalities, frailties etc…

of course we all judge the little things and make comments on others in everyday situations hut talking about the big things….I do try and let it go…its healthier and enables a person to move on and try to make better choices and memories..

Hope this helps

congrats on POTD from David

By: Kimberly

Kimberly — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 02:40:47 +0000

You have such a gift with words.

I’m glad he called, but sorry he dropped this on you. Thinking of you . . .

By: Bruce

Bruce — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 23:26:09 +0000

This was an exceptionally good read. Very well written and engrossing. Subtle in it’s tone, but it speak far more than the sum of the words. Well done…..don’t change a thing, regardless of who reads it.

By: Stacie

Stacie — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 03:27:42 +0000

You write so beautifully! I just want to wrap up that little girl that was you and take her home with me. Not before giving your parents a huge ration of you know what!

By: the mama bird diaries

the mama bird diaries — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 02:06:14 +0000

I am so sorry that your past is so difficult.

Your blog looks good. Did you do a little rearranging?

By: david mcmahon

david mcmahon — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 01:56:05 +0000

Can I simply say that we, your readers, care deeply.

By: V-Grrrl

V-Grrrl — Sun, 25 Jan 2009 20:49:50 +0000

Oh Jennifer, I can’t imagine being told all those years that your mother left because she didn’t love you.

What a monstrous thing to say, what a cruel myth to perpetuate.

I can’t fathom the depth of that hurt…